Well, if they gonna suspend your ass, I’ll walk you down there.” She got upset.”īlack Chuck burst out laughing. It’s because I said in my speech that God wasn’t a man and didn’t have a package. So where we going, Ju? Don’t tell me you cutting. I jumped when I heard the voice behind me. Running my fingers through my hair, I headed out to face the dean, thanking Diana as I left. I patted my face dry with scraping brown paper towels, careful not to smear my (thankfully waterproof) mascara. The shock of the water made me feel a bit better. I splashed cold water on my face and let it spike my lashes and dribble into my eyes. All you needed to know was a little pig Latin and a little Creole and you could crack pretty much any code. I’d spent lots of toilet-sittings deciphering their codes. The worst culprits were the school’s biggest girl gang, the RLB, aka the Real Live Bitches. The graffiti was mostly gang stuff: RLB rock da house, Hermanas Mexicalis is bad bitches, Crab girls got crabs. Our bathrooms were like a mini Brooklyn housing project, littered with trash and covered in graffiti. “I’ve been sent to the dean’s office by Ms. “Hey there, baby.” Diana reached out to receive my bathroom pass, but I shook my head. Her job was to spend her entire day outside the girls’ bathroom, making sure nothing nasty was happening-no drugs, no fights . . . She was in her forties, with bleached-blond hair and heavy-metal tattoos. I guess I needed a few minutes to let the redness in my cheeks go down.Įverybody knew Diana the bathroom lady. I surprised myself by heading toward the bathroom on my way to the dean’s office. Or would he be proud that I stuck to my guns? I doubted it. Dad was going to kick my ass if he had to take off work to go to a suspension hearing. My legs felt like jelly, probably more from the stress of the situation than anything else. She didn’t think that A-student Julia DiVino would dare stand up to her. As everybody watched, I picked up my books and stalked out. The class was so quiet, you could hear a pin drop. Knowing when to shut up wasn’t usually a problem for me, but I heard myself saying, “This isn’t fair. “But this was one of the choices you gave us! It was topic seven-explore how different cultures-” “Too bad you didn’t choose a more appropriate topic.” “You’re not gonna let me present it? I spent a lot of time on this.” She yelled at everyone to settle down, but no one paid attention. I didn’t know if she was going to pass out or go postal. “That’s when you got a package and a coochie.” “Not a transvestite, dumbass, a hermaphrodite,” Cassie said. “So God is a transvestite?” Jay shouted from the back row.

“You saying God is a girl?” Eddie Evans shouted. “The whole idea of God looking like a man is a European concept. But we’ve got no proof of that.”Įverybody gasped. People always make it sound like God is a man.

Snitch by Allison van Diepen